I'm feeling a little sad today in seeing all the Facebook posts and pictures about the ECES graduating 4th grade class and realizing that we are very, very far away. All my son's friends and their parents are there, but we're not. And because HOPAC graduates in 5th grade, not 4th, there's nothing "special" for Josh this year. That makes my heart twinge because although it wasn't his choice to move away, he is facing the results of that decision.
I've often wished that we could push the "pause" button on life in the U.S. while we're here. Then we wouldn't miss anything or anyone!
Despite missing things in NJ, at the same time, I'm realizing this week how much of a "home" Tanzania has become. If we left today, there are so many people I would genuinely miss...and new traditions that are being formed.
Can you have two homes? Or three? If I'm confused, how much more so are my kids?
I've been meaning to read the book about Third Culture Kids the whole year, but it's a really long book, and the concept was more abstract than concrete up until now. (the short synopsis is that after living abroad, my kids will most likely no longer feel American....but they aren't Tanzanian either. They are a Third Culture).
Big transitions are coming. HOPAC is a very mobile community and there are many families that are moving on (including Josh's new best friend). Things are going to look a lot different here in just a couple of weeks. The next few months will be filled with lots of transition as we leave, come back again, say farewell to some families and give a welcome to others.
Even when we do return to the U.S. "for good," I know things won't pick up exactly where they left because the pause button hasn't been pushed. Our family, and everyone we know, are different - changed by our differing circumstances.
I'm still incredibly grateful for the opportunity for my kids to live abroad, make friends from around the world and experience new cultures. But I'm realizing today that this opportunity comes at a cost for them.
But their worldview will be so much bigger when you and they return home. :-)
ReplyDeleteAs someone who moved a lot while growing up, I'd say it really helped me when I went away to college and (more recently) when I started working in a new city. Moving forced me to make new friends which cannot be understated. It taught me how to find a home church and how to make mature decisions. When I got to college I was able to adapt pretty quickly which - based on some of what I saw the first year - was a real blessing.
ReplyDeleteYes, I may have lost something, but looking back I don't even know what.